TOUR DIARY
The following is Billy’s
personal tour diary for the 1990 tour of Brazil (The Brazamanaz Tour).
The original is hand written on the back pages of his tour itinerary
book.
5.12.90
Flights
– Edinburgh – London – Sao Paulo
6.12.90
Arrived
Brazil, 6am. Long wait at passport
control and customs area for duty free. Arrived
at hotel 10.45, rooms not ready.
11.00 - shower etc. 11.30
– press conference by the pool then lunch and more press.
16.30 – MTV interview. Long
drive to the studio, which has no air conditioning, need another shower!
19.30 – another shower, phoned home then dinner and bar.
Bed!!!!!!!!!! Zzzzzzz.
P.S.
Famous Brazilian fitba legend, Zico, was at the corner table in the bar
and I didn’t get his autograph. Nobody
told us it was him ‘til he left. (No
happy!!!)
7.12.90
Restless
night, woken by rooster outside window at 4.30am!!
Couldn’t get back to sleep, read book and had a glass of Coke and a fag
(Scottish slang for cigarette). Dropped
off again around 6.30. Woke 10.15,
still tired but awake. Lay around a
bit, had a shower and tidied room (all very slowly).
Had leisurely (slow) lunch wi’ Dan & Pete at 12.30. Went to Dan’s room to work on possible set list.
Returned to room and waited for call for 3pm soundcheck.
(MTV were videoing it) Dan
phoned, soundcheck now at 4pm. Read
book. 4.30pm arrive to do
soundcheck, great sounding venue but very warm onstage.
3500 expected. Back for some
soup at hotel at 7.30, another shower etc.
Everything now running 1 hour late, we are now on at 11pm.
Arrived at gig 10pm. Everyone’s
pacing the dressing room wanting to go on “NOW”, crowd cheering every time
roadies go near the stage, house full! 11.15pm
we go on. Great gig, best ever
first night, I ran around a little too much in the heat and took an hour to cool
down and get breath back later. Ate
6 big oranges, had a beer then back to hotel.
Everyone’s pleased but tired. (It’s
now 1.30am). Straight to room, straight to sleep!!
8.12.90
Whit
a kip! (sleep). Woke at midday, had
shower and went for lunch with Dan & Pete.
Lunch was terrible! Assorted
parts of pig - all disgusting. Had
some fruit and dessert. Willie has
arranged trip to shopping mall at 2.30pm. Pete
doesn’t fancy it; Dan has to go to radio station.
Everyone else gets on hotel bus. Arrive
at mall, 3.15pm, first stop Big Mac, we are all starving. Fernando, our guide from the agency, takes us to sport shop
(the owner’s his pal). I get two
Brazil strips and extra top for $50 (£25).
You couldnae get one strip back home for £25!!
Everyone splits up, agreeing to meet at bus at 4.30pm.
Fernando comes with me, keeps taking me into shops to meet more of his
pals! I’m trying to find
headphones but can’t shake Fernando who says it’s too dangerous to be on my
own. He won’t even let me carry
the sports shop bag in case I’m raped or something.
Head back to hotel at 4.30, downtown streets packed (3 lanes each way)
with cars. Wee black kids (3/4
years old) dart in and out of the traffic, begging for money from drivers.
Fernando said most of them would be killed in traffic or starve. I was eating fruit sweets and felt suddenly sick.
The kids were beautiful, their big dark eyes stared into the bus and I
felt choked, I suppose. Sometimes I hate this world!!
Back to nice food-laden, air-conditioned, soft bedded, luxury filled
hotel! I wish I could’ve taken
all these innocent babies with me. Look
forward to the gig, I need cheering up. Edson,
tour manager, is taking crew to barbeque at 8.30pm so I tag along.
The place turns out to be a huge hall-like eatery, very posh and
obviously very popular. You can
help yourself to salad and then the waiters come ‘round with various barbequed
meat (beef, chicken, pork ribs etc.) all stacked on huge skewers which they
deposit on your plate ‘til you tell them to stop.
This continues all night and you have to leave the table if you want them
to leave you alone. All you can eat
for about £6!! I ate sparingly as
I knew I still had a gig to do in an hour or so but the crew could hardly walk
out the door afterwards and all wanted to go to their beds.
The gig was even better than last nights; we played really well (Willie
recons the best ever!) and it
didn’t seem so hot on stage so we weren’t so out of breath by the end. After saying “Hello, how was the show?” to various MTV
personnel, we boarded the bus, stopping off for a beer at a local rum hut.
We soon realized we didn’t belong and fled to the hotel.
Another great gig! Zzzzzzz.
9.12.90
Woke
up late again (12.30) and watched TV for a while (Trains, Planes and Automobiles
with Steve Martin speaking Brazilian!)
Met Edson for lunch downstairs. As
there’s nothing to do ‘til we leave at 8pm for the one-hour drive to the
gig, everyone’s just loafing around in their room, I do the same.
Live football on TV at 4pm (Antarctica v’s somebody) so that passes the
time well enough. These boys could
demolish any European team although their style of play can get a bit boring. Went to Vinnie’s room ‘cos his telly’s got MTV.
Traveled to gig in Santo Andre which was an hour and a half of bumps and
stops right through Sao Paulo itself. The
gig is a big gymnasium and the sound coming back onto the stage makes the
monitors obsolete but we still play well and the audience seem to enjoy it.
One punter manages to scale the stage and joins me for a spot of
headbanging complete with invisible guitar before being rugby tackled by
security and literally thrown back into the crowd.
We get him backstage later and congratulate him on his stupidity.
He smiles and shows us his bruises.
Local Police (wi’ big guns!) come in and “ask” us for our T shirts,
which we remove, and autograph with great speed.
We return to hotel bare chisted!
10/11/12.12.90
Early
rise as we are off to Rio ahead of schedule and minus the crew (pulling rank!)
The flight took an hour and the view of Rio from the plane is
breathtaking. We fly over the
famous Sugar Loaf mountain and then see even more of the statue of Christ before
touching down at Rio’s downtown airport.
A quick limo ride (pretentious, moi?) and we’re at the Hotel
International Rio on the sea front in Copacabana.
It’s everything I’d imagined Rio would be.
Blue sky and sea, massive golden beaches, palm trees swaying, tanned
bodies, expensive looking shops and hotels…. the ultimate “Successville!”
Drive down Atlantic Avenue and you feel like a millionaire!
The hotel is 5-star and we decide to have a drink in the lobby bar before
going upstairs for a shower and to try to take it all in.
An hour later we meet on the roof where you can view the city in full and
enjoy another drink or two by the pool (well, it is a day off!)
I appear in tracksuit attire much to everyone’s surprise, and then
strip off to reveal my ‘muscular’ body in full Brazil FC colours.
High up behind us is the big Christian statue (or the “Hang Glider”
as Edson informs us it’s locally known as) looks down in probable dismay at
the sinful God-fearless citizens of Rio as they live life to the full, mostly
due to immoral earnings and Brazil’s bizarre immunity from prosecution.
(Ye canny touch me, he he!) Pete
looks up and admits it’s almost a holy experience, before ordering another
round! Night falls and the statue
lights up, then a massive firework display begins so we all gasp and make
whooping noises before turning to watch the floodlit footballers on the beach
showing their skills. Pete and I
study the star-lit sky (all the constellations are upside-down ‘cos so are
we!) and Pete points out the
Southern Cross, which isn’t visible from the Northern Hemisphere, then we
track a satellite, which we later discover was probably the Space Shuttle
re-entering the atmosphere to land in America the following morning. Pete then exclaims that our wives should never talk to us
again! I defend myself, saying
I’ve done nothing immoral or illegal so why should Mary never want to talk to
me again. “Cos yer in Rio, an’
she’s no’!!” Rightfully
speechless, we continue ‘suffering’ the paradise of de Janeiro until we
crawl down to bed to await the suffering of the ‘morning after’.
The next day sees us repeating the previous night’s ‘hell’ although
some of the boys brave the chair lift to Sugar Loaf and Hang Glider only to
return feeling worse than the ones who stayed at home.
Pete, Dan and I spend the afternoon in Dan’s room drinking beer and
watching TV. Dan is pondering what
to tell the folks back home “What we did in Rio?”
“The same as we did in Milwaukee!” I reply which becomes my “One
liner of the tour” award winner.
Next
day, we watch more TV then go to do the gig, which Pete describes as a “Major
interruption to our time-off in Rio” (his “One-liner” nomination).
The gig is great despite a few technical problems (serves ye right,
Peter!) and we all ‘enjoy’ a Japanese meal, the worst ever, before crawling
Sake-eyed to bed. Phil described
the Rio gig as the best ever. Even
“The Veil” sounded good, so Santos was looked forward to with a “Haud me
back” attitude!
13.12.90
Disappointment?
Never!!
At
the airport we were mobbed by TV crews and fans and we quickly realized that
Nazareth were ‘quite big’ in this town.
Two hours before show time, the local promoter’s band were told by our
‘sensitive, caring crew’ to “Bugger off!” as they had just managed to
get the gear set up before the doors opened and 6000 punters had enjoyed the
ritual sound-checking of the Tam, Rab, Willie, Neiley, Philey Show for which
they cheered louder than the would have for the promoter’s band themselves!
By the time we went on, the noise from the arena was almost
“Beatle-ish” and we could do no wrong.
Dan sang “Big Boy” from a lying position on the stage and, as I
straddled him (Steady!!!) for the solo, he decided to get up and met the
Les Paul full in the pus! The crowd
were incredible! Even after
numerous encores, we left for the hotel and I could still hear them screaming as
I stepped into the shower in my room. Just
like the good ole days!!
14.12.90
Off
to Curitiba. We’re cooking now
and despite chronic lack of sleep, we can’t wait to play tonight.
The hotel is situated at the entrance to a shopping mall so we all split
up to purchase various necessary toiletries before meeting unintentionally at a
hot dog stall for dreadful sustenance. The
gig is, once again, a stormer and we attend a post-concert party, briefly, as we
learn that yet another early departure is to befall us.
15.12.90
I
answer my first wake-up call with sarcastic unreality; answer my second by
slamming down the phone! Answer my
third (we only get two!) to hear my dear wife at the other end complaining that
someone hung up on her a minute ago (oops!) as she tried to wish me a happy 11
Wedding anniversary (Aw naw!!) Just when you think it can’t get any worse, it DOES!!
Dan, Pete, Darrell, Vinnie and I arrive at reception to leave for the
airport. Our driver arrives in a
Toyota pick-up! He’s big, very
black, wearing expensive leather and silk; sporting the biggest Rolex you’ve
ever seen and has a massive Magnum on the dashboard!
Temper’s frayed, we eventually find ourselves being driven by a man
who’s had even less sleep than us, looking through a windscreen even we
can’t see through and all the time keeping an eye on the Magnum on the dash.
½ hour out of town, we notice a series of crash barriers closing off the
highway. Our driver proceeds right
through them and missed a concrete wall by inches!
I enquire to Dan and Pete how long it takes to become a fully-fledged
Pape and almost lose my life at the airport as I call our driver a
“Fornicating masturbator!” Arriving
in Brasilia, I immediately kneel down to whomever and call Mary to apologize for
what happened earlier. Luckily, she
received my red rose, as planned, and didn’t add to my nightmare de jour. I love that girl! Brasilia
is the capital of Brazil! Milton
Keynes was based on it, seriously!! The gig was full of ‘designer audience’ and, just to end
a perfect day, my amps were live! I couldn’t touch the mic without receiving
40 volts through my lips and I, quite rightly in my opinion, demanded extra life
insurance on what was, After all, my Wedding Anniversary.
Gig done, no real harm done, back to hotel where, after signing
autographs, we retire to “Final Resting Room’ where I am disturbed by local
groupie ON MY BLOODY ANNIVERSARY!!!!!!
16.12.90
Final
gig! Sao Paulo!
10000, SOLD OUT!! I’ve got
one Marshal amp and two 4x12’s. Remainder
of gear has mysteriously vanished!! Video
cameramen showing gig on giant screens around the arena and it was F.I.N.E.!!!
Brazilian
Promoter – “Well done Naz!”
Wee Naz Guitarist – “Where’s ma stacks!!???”
Brazilian Promoter – “Well done Beeley!”
Wee Naz Guitarist – “I wiz playin’ through a Walkman!!”
Brazilian
Promoter – “Well done Beeley!”
Wee Naz Guitarist – “How was it out front, Phil?”
Phil – “Great”
Wee Naz Guitarist – “I love you Brazil, ya jammy sods, how did I look??”
Brazilian Promoter – “Viva Nazareth!”
WNG – “Thanks neebs!!” (It’s
only rock n roll!!)
THANKS
TO
Dan
My dinner lady.
Pete
My biggest fan.
Darrell
Playin' yer arse off, privilege to play with ye!
(Heartfelt!)
Tam
"That’s what I’m here for".
Rab
“Is this the plane for the Betty Ford Clinic?”
Phil
“Best Nazareth ever” – he should know.
Neil
“Shake yer erse, I’ll follow ye!”
Wullie
“We are basic people.”
Vinnie
Tour manager in name only, pal for life!
Edson
“What’s going on ‘ere?”
Promoters
“Que???”
